My Valentine Thoughts♥

My Valentine Thoughts♥

• 14 February 2013

val·en·tine

   [val-uhn-tahyn]

noun

1.

a card or message, usually amatory or sentimental butsometimes satirical or comical, or a token or gift sent by oneperson to another on Valentine Day, sometimesanonymously.

2.

a sweetheart chosen or greeted on this day.

3.

a written or other artistic work, message, token, etc.,expressing affection for something or someone: Hisphotographic essay is a valentine to Paris.

Everyday should be Valentines' Day  ♥
Not only Today

It's not as if you love your other half more on this day, but you should still love the same everyday.
And, I think buying flowers on Valentines' Day is really sweet yet not practical because it's triple the price & it's only for that one moment where the girl goes 'AWWW SO SWEET! Take Pic!' then you end up holding the bouquet the entire nightout and then start waiting for it to wither.

Maybe, rainbow roses are the only exceptions, it's so pretty, totally worth the money!

Girls, in our life, there are bound to have guys who have tried to date you...

I call some of them, players. I don't know if I would accept a date if I were to be in my posted original secondary school, cause some friends I met in Poly (who were from that school) told me that I would probably stand out amongst the girls there :/ I took that as a compliment *winks* but deep down and thinking back, based on my morals, I know I still won't. Have I mentioned how much I have no interest in xiao didis or scene kids. For real. I understand, many a times, we get temptations of getting into a relationship, especially during the Valentines' Day period. I am no exception, however, I always managed to keep myself saint. It isn't hard to do so, because I know myself well and what I truly want/deserve. Truth is, I really cannot bring myself to get into a 'PLAY PLAY FOR FUN' relationship. I know there are no guarantees in matters of the heart and a lot of times, people have encouraged me to accept it for the experience. Still, I would only accept a guy if I feel that there's potential to progress into more than just a boyfriend stage. He truly has to be a soulmate & a part of me. If not, forget it. I won't want to waste my time, effort & money on it. Most importantly, I cannot imagine myself being so close to someone for a period of time together and then if we breakup, then what happens? Like hey he's the one that I kissed before, hugged before, shared things with before... Wouldn't it be so awkward? :/

So anyways, I'm actually kinda glad that I got into CHIJ instead. No, rephrase don't get me wrong, I'm straight. Just that the 4years of being in a convent school, showed me how sweet girls can be on Valentines' day. I remember those heartshaped balloons, letters, flowers, we girls just showered lovely gifts to each other very openly!

Speaking of so, I miss spending Valentines in a girls school, with such an attitude as mentioned above

IJ Clique!


Celebrating V'day in University or rather SMU is not too bad! It was quite enjoyable hanging around with my friends and with the CCA clubs having welfare drives. Of course, not forgetting the awesome presents I received this year. So much love, heh! Thanks v much!


Every year without fail, I make it a point to appreciate my friends on Valentines' Day. Show my love for them. And, here you go! Personalized a little something for them ^^

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

First & Last boyfriend is of utmost, utmost importance.

For me, I believe your FIRST boyfriend would be an example of your choice of 'Dream' guy. Definition. He probably would be someone you are willing to invest your everything in him and hope things work out for you both. People would probably judge your taste based on your choice of boyfriend too, at least the type of guy you are willing to accept in the first place, right. Which is why I wouldn't compromise on anything less than my ideal, especially not my first. Which is why if I haven't met him, I wouldn't accept anyone else. Why settle for the alternative when God has the best plans for me? First's is important. He probably would be the one whom you would based your future boyfriend comparisons on and you'll only realise it when you are in your next relationship.
I like the quote from 那些年，我们一起追的女孩

被你喜欢过，很难觉得别人有那么喜欢我 . . .

♥ IDEAL CRITERIA

1. Love God

2. Love Me

3. Love Kids

Basically, it's quite simple through there's a mental checklist. Great smile, someone I don't mind starring for long periods of time, and the list goes on. But beyond all looks, personality and character is what I look for too. Someone sweet and one whom I can share my life to, who understands me aka what I would label 'is able to think alike (communicating with the eyes & not with the mouth) and finish my sentences (literally).' Well, besides being able to entertain me, I need someone who complements me and sees the best in me. He should also be someone who can better me and mould me into someone more matured. Spiritually, it's not a must that the boyfriend has to be Christian as of now, like I won't limit myself but why I would say it's a plus plus point is because I'm thinking further about marriage too. Issues like “Will it be important to him that our children are raised by godly principles? Living a biblical life and being in a relationship with God in the centre". We got to be in sync on these issues if not there's no point carrying on. Well, having said that to sum up this segment, he doesn't have to be and I know he definitely won't be the perfect guy on Earth. But I believe that with God’s guidance, He will lead me to the person who is the best match for me.

Until then.

When we play HTHT games during school camps, I get 'HUH' looks when I say I'm not attached. #okaycanthanks
But let me just clarify, why I cannot bring myself to get into a random relationship unless I find my Prince Charming (kidding!) AKA Choosing God's Best

I can’t say that I’m an expert on relationships, but if there is one thing that I wanna share my take on, it's that I believe I should never settle for less than God’s best. And on my part, I'm saving myself for the one who truly deserves me. I choose to keep myself pure so that when presented to him it's only fair.

1) I guess it's because I take relationships very seriously and would commit my wholeself into it. So if the guy hurts me, I would be doubly sad. Not that I cannot stand being hurt, but it's just the feeling of having ever cared that's why it's worth crying over it.

2) I can only bring myself to do a lot of sweet things for the guy if I really love him. True Story. So See! I can't get into a relationship with a guy I don't truly love because I would be a 'bad' gf and it wouldn't be fair for him. For me, it's either be the bestest gf (in his eyes and to my standards) if not don't be at all. That kinda logic...

3) In a relationship, when 2 people are together, I would share everything with my boyfriend, like my life & all. Talk about topics close to my heart, friends and family. SO can u imagine if one day we break up, how awkward it would be? Because he knows everything about me already -.- Yeah. Told my friends this point & they replied me with 'oh I don't tell him my everything la' but I can't do that, because I think that being together means trust and sharing life together.

***

It's easy to make me happy, to cheer me up, I'm quite a simple girl. I don't expect materalistic things and don't you ever turn me into one of those girls. Just get me those typical girly things like pink-red-hello kitty, etc & I'll be happy. I appreciate handmade stuffs the most! Some Chanel, Tiffany & Co would do the trick too teeheee I'm kidding!

Through I really do love flowers, darkchocs and all sorts of girly things but, sometimes I think I'm quite like a guy when it comes to relationship issues. Especially having seen how couples behave and the consequences of it. I have come to realise it's just my nature to tend to see things from the guy's point of view, idk why. maybe it's cause...
成长的阵痛就是，女孩总是比同龄的男孩成熟。而女孩的这种成熟，让每个男孩都招架不了。。

I honestly think I make a very sweet girlfriend, haha (*disclaimer: only to the guy I would really commit to) 

♥ THE TRUE SELF 

I'm actually the kind of girl who...

1) I won't get angry easily UNLESS you really angered me (& fyi, that takes a lot of effort to do so). Even if I do, he should know that I would eventually be fine, but please don't take my good nature for granted (Sometimes I think to myself, I should really get very angry so he won't take it for granted that I would forgive me every single time). I don't understand the rationale of having cold wars or being angry with the other party for a couple of days expecting the guy to say sorry first. Sorry, I don't think it should be that way.

2) Cannot stand PETTY guys, please don't get angry over small little things. Not worth it! & hello, I'm the girl and I'm not even getting angry so why should you?

3) Will be in a open relationship, not an underground one... because I should be proud of my other half or else why be together. Then again, I won't be that type of girl who's whole life revolve around the guy and everything open mouth close mouth also about the boyfriend. ohmygod.

4) Won't make my boyfriend purposely pay for my expenses, just because... he is NOT obliged to. Of course, special occasions' presents and surprises are an exception. But on normal days and of things that I want, I'd rather buy it myself & won't imposed my wants on him. I mean it would be uber sweet if he buys if for me volunteery but of course if that goes on for too many times, I would feel super guilty too. And on the flipside, I think I would buy for him if I know he really wants it, heh.

                                   ♥ CAN'T STAND GIRLS WHO

1) Play Hard to Get

WLAU You think you like a queen? If you are not interested in that guy, forget it. Don't make him chase you like an idiot whereas on your side, you act as if nothing's happening and feign ignorance. It's kinda irritating, ya know!

2) Not being true to their own Personality
Just because you belong to someone else literally, does not mean you aren't and can't be yourself. One should be honest with how you feel and think. Let him see the real you. This applies especially on first or subsequent dates. This is just a very simple basic fundamental test to see if you really likes you for who you are. So if that date works out, GOOD! If it doesn't, too bad move on and find a better guy. He doesn't deserve you anyways.

3) Keep on Crying and Crying...
Stay strong, girls! I honestly think, I won't waste my tears and time crying over a breakup. It's quite attention seeking as well. Tsk, cry for what! It's over. Done and Through. Maybe cry awhile because he betrayed me and I loved him so. But I would think on the bright side, because it's his loss and also, since he has decided to move on, why should I cry over someone who isn't worth my tears, right? It also means that think 'Thankgod just be glad we broke up now, rather than imagine we are married than divorce'. Even more wasted. Women, never be too reliant on a Guy.

4) Too Clingy!
In relationships, there are no rules no laws. You don't have to be with your guy 24/7. It's not a convenience shop, so don't treat your guy conveniently (when you need him then call him when you don't need him then leave him alone). You don't have to report your everymove to him and please don't expect him to do so. You should also trust that he doesn't betray you. Trust is of basic.

5) Lead Guys on and on and on...

Oei! Don't like the guy from the start but still keep on texting him and giving false hopes? It can be quite fun to 'flirt' around and girls naturally like having attention. But, end of the day, for me, I would just stop everything from the start if I don't like him, I mean no point... so don't even bother progressing further. Some say I'm mean cause I'm not even giving him a chance. But you see, my logic is: Stop now hurt lesser. Rather than you keep dragging things on and giving false hopes, end up hurt him more, right?

6) "Friendzone" Guys
Okay, I don't understand this. I don't believe in Friendzone because I think all relationships have stages and all should start with friendship first. Get to know the person better and hopefully, if you are close enough you can get together? Guys, like that it's easier to ask the girl to be your gf too. haha, but yeah really, to me I will only get together with someone whom I know well enough and am comfortable being with. I don't have to put up a front when I'm with him because he already knows how I'm like as a person and I know how he's like also. I mean, in the first place, if I'm not interested in you, I won't even bother getting to let you know me so much more.

♥ ISSUES I THINK ARE DOWNRIGHT LAME

1) Cannot go club unless your partner goes
Okay, this totally doesn't apply to me because I would gladly sleep than to club. Even if I go, my mindset and heart motive should be right. I don't see anything wrong with just going to enjoy with your friends or chill out. Of course, it's not to try hooking another guy. The other party should always trust that the other half would not betray. Basic trust. I don't see why the guy should be worried for the girl. Dude, sometimes trust your girl. If not, she's not even worth the keep.

2) 24/7 together
That's sweet, but look, even married couples don't do that. No strings attached yo! Let each other go out and have as much fun as he/she wants and you should do so too. Being attached doesn't mean you can't go out with friends of the opposite gender or even take individual photos with them. If your other half doesn't let you do so, omg you should reconsider him/her. What he/she is actually doing, is handicapping your social life. Just because of one person, you give up your entire universe? Sorry I can't do that. Too unreasonable! Basis: We are two seperate people, we lead seperate lives just that our lives became intertwined. But I would appreciate if you give me my freedom that I would really need along the way. I guess it all boils down to accountability because if you keep your other half in the loop of things going on in your life, he/she won't suspect as much!

3) Breakup, Friends no more!
I don't understand why. Maybe I've no such experience in this aspect, but I think every breakup should have good endings. Best to be mutual. If you had chosen the right guy in the first place, firstly you won't end up on a bad note. He should solve everything maturely. The only right reason for breaking up is probably you two realise you don't suit each other. Then just talk over it, and move on. Who says you can't be friends. Unless it's the case of betrayal, then it's gonna be awkward.

                                         
                                                                                ♥ ISSUES I THINK ARE SWEET

1) Knowing each other's family & friends
It shows that you are keeping an open relationship, not an underground one. Also, you want to know more than just him and him alone. I guess it's rather nice to know who your other half hangs out with and who his closer friends are. Getting to know their family members is another thing. heh. FYI, knowing them would make planning of surprises for each other on special dates, so much easier!

2) Couple Item/Significant moment

Something that as a couple, you guys will always remember or do together. Something that is uniquely yours, unique to your relationship. Something dear to both parties. I'll do a photoshoot for sure, haha!

3) Changing, for you
It's so sweet and worth-marrying if the guy changes for the better, just for you. For example, smoking. It's a good and most notable change. It really means that you mean something to him. Well done! You are now officially the most important thing to him, not his cigarettes. He's willing to give that up, and not give you up.

4) Making Compromises
There are bound to be compromises and sacrifices to be made in every relationship. So compromise! It's not worth losing the one you love just because of your stupid little, PRIDE. Compromises come with understanding as well, you got to be understanding towards each other before being able to compromise happily. Remember, a small compromise goes a long way. Very worthwhile step to take!

***

End of the day, "It's better to be the girl that everyone wants and cannot get than the girl that everyone wants and can get"

FYI, everything I've shared in this post, is probably influenced by the TV as I started watching tv dramas at a young age so I've subconsciously learnt about relationships. Also, from all the relationships I've seen etc. I'm kinda proud of myself for being very matured about such things from a young age...

The question, is this: Are you willing to wait for God’s best or are you simply settling for all the rest? I'm on the waiting side.

"Choosing the right partner is vital but this is no easy feat. You know that you have found that special someone when your quality of life is seemingly enhanced much as the right partner brings out the best in you. In times of conflict, the right partner would see this as a growth opportunity for us as a couple and a chance to better ourselves. It is essential to improve ourselves whether we are in a relationship or not, the right partner would be very open to change and growth. With the right partner, your team is stronger. With the right partner, you have the courage to brave the winds, you have the ability to race down the speed bumps of life and feel on top of the world."

Remember this,

1 John 3:16 (New International Version, ©2010)16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.

Because Valentines day is more than just sweet words, hugs xoxo and pretty presents. We are only able to LOVE because God first loved us.